When I look in the mirror, one of a few thoughts will come to mind: “You’re too fat, you need to lose weight,” “Why can’t you look like those Instagram models?” or, “People won’t like you if you look this way.” Ever since I reached the alarming situation called puberty, this malicious way of thinking has taken over my developing brain. Social media, movies, and TV shows can be blamed for my toxic mindset. They don’t teach girls to appreciate their features but instead promote ways to alter themselves for society’s satisfaction. Media regularly objectifies women’s bodies, as if we are inanimate and emotionless. Plastic surgery, liposuction, and even rhinoplasty are advertised to prepubescent girls who think they don’t have the so-called “ideal body.” Numerous celebrities use Facetune and Photoshop to alter their body and facial features in abnormal ways, just to deceive their followers. No human being is born with a 2-inch waist, Kim Kardashian! With every scroll on Instagram comes another promotion for a new face or body enhancing product.

Even my own mother told me my cheeks were too chubby, my face was too round, and my thighs weren’t skinny enough. She said that I should get facial enhancements when I’m older. She told me boys would think I looked disgusting if I were too heavy, so I began to eat less, and to starve myself frequently. She then asked me, “Why are you dieting? You’re too young to try to be skinny.” My head was in shambles. I didn’t know what to look like and how to please others. My mental health was deteriorating as quickly as the days passed. I would self-consciously walk through the halls, thinking that every pair of eyes were glued onto me, as if I had toilet paper stuck to my shoe. I developed anxiety during my pre-teen years, wanting to only dress in a hoodie and a pair of leggings to hide my figure. I would run as far as possible if someone told me to wear a dress. As I grew up, I came to the realization that I was my own enemy. The only person that held me back from loving myself was me. Buddha once said, “You, yourself, as much as anybody else in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.”

Despite the many critiques I have been given over the years, I didn’t want to allow it to harm my pride. I can look how I please, even if it doesn’t satisfy society’s standards. As cliché as it might sound, it doesn’t matter how you look on the outside, all that matters is who you are on the inside. I quickly came to the conclusion that if I continued to internalize others’ judgments, I would never truly be happy with myself. It doesn’t matter if my face is too round, if my waist isn’t small enough, or if I am too short. Beauty comes in various shapes and sizes, so each figure holds its own charm.

Millions of men and women struggle with their body image, and this should not be the case. Nature created everyone in a unique way for a reason, and it should be encouraged, not discouraged. Caving into the ridicule of others is much easier than believing in ourselves. Our resilience to others’ remarks about our appearances demonstrates our strength. Even with the thousands of comments I receive from my mom on a weekly basis, I know she still loves me for who I am. I am a beautiful woman who wants to achieve many goals in the future. I am an honor roll student with exceptional grades. I am a devoted daughter of a loving family and would never trade my appearance for another body. I am satisfied with who I am, how I am, and what I was born with. I love myself.

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