Covid affected me and has changed everything in my life. Ever since this pandemic started, death has been following me and it has been driving me crazy knowing that the people I know could die at any moment. It has put lots of pressure on me to become the best I can be.

I didn't always think like this though. I was once a relaxed, calm, and talkative person, but covid changed me. Covid was simply something I heard about on the news. It existed outside of the walls of my home. It existed beyond the reach of my family. Then, it started infecting my own family. My uncle, Pancho, died from covid. His death affected my mom and me because we were very close to him. I felt really sad because he left behind four kids and a wife.

As a result, it felt like covid was creeping and crawling closer to me, and it was only a matter of time before one of us would get it. I was right. My oldest brother was the first one to get it in our house and then spread it to everyone in my family except me. At first, I didn't think much of it. I thought he was only sick, but a positive test confirmed our fears. We were all shocked because he said he didn't feel that bad. On the third day, it hit me that there was a real possibility that my family could die. As a result, I felt worried for them and me.

I was isolated and I couldn't do the things I would ordinarily do like play with my brothers and hug my parents. I also couldn't go outside of my room and I felt so lonely because I no longer could go eat dinner and lunch with everyone. Instead, I was alone in my room with the box full of yogurt my mom would bring me. She was my only human interaction in the house. The only time I was able to leave my room was to use the restroom.

I felt worried because I was drowning in a pool of my thoughts. I wondered if I would ever be able to hug my mom again. I wondered if my family would ever get better. I wondered when I would be able to come out of my room again. I was overthinking, wondering, and stressing all alone. I still think about that time when I was in my tiny room all alone for what seemed like forever. It was the first time I was so terrified. I couldn't stop thinking about what would happen to me if they didn't get better. Who would take care of me?

Covid had long-lasting effects on me. However, I am fighting a new virus. It is fear and loneliness. I hate staying in my room all alone and hate being alone. I think covid did this to me because before this I didn't mind being alone. Luckily over time, this has gotten better though now I feel like I can stay in my room for much longer without feeling alone. I still get really worried whenever someone gets sick. Is it a common cold? Is it covid? Are we dying? I look at life differently now because I am more appreciative of my health, my family's health, and the fact that I am alive.

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