Change is not something most people think about until it confronts them. My sister Caroline, half-sister Christian, and I were given a necklace that helped all of us adjust to a powerful change. A couple years back my grandma Mimi had been diagnosed with lung cancer, and she was a fighter. Everyone was scared for the future and knew that there were going to be changes in the family, but we kept our heads up and kept pushing through. On Christmas, 2020, my Mimi sat me and my sisters down and handed each of us a box. Inside, the box was lined in piercing blue and held a silver necklace with an infinity symbol pendant. She then shared that these necklaces represented the un-ending love that she had for us. I was overwhelmed with emotions and didn’t have words to express them. I immediately connected with the necklace and knew that I would keep it with me wherever I went. My Mimi knew that I would always take care of it and never leave it behind. I kept this necklace clasped around my neck every single day and never took it off. One day it got caught on something and the chain broke completely in half. I was devastated and started to break down; this was so much more than just a necklace. It represented love.

February of 2021 was completely rocky. Covid-19, a worldwide pandemic and a highly contagious illness, caused thousands of deaths and damaged just about everyone, including me. Because my Mimi had lung cancer and was immunocompromised, she was at high risk from the disease. This meant that if she were to get Covid there would be severe symptoms. I couldn’t see my Mimi often because of this pandemic. When I contracted Covid-19 in the beginning of February, I worried that I could have spread it to my family and especially my Mimi. Luckily, we were in the clear and everyone else stayed healthy, but that month grew more complicated as the days went by. I went on vacation, with my best friend, to Florida for a week during Spring Break. While I was gone, a family friend unexpectedly passed away. This devastated me, and I had to have that conversation on my own, over the phone, hours and hours away. I struggled with the change of losing this person.

The changes kept coming. When I returned home from vacation, my family gathered to discuss my Mimi’s condition: she was getting worse and worse. There were no other medications or trials for the type of cancer she had. She was dying. When my parents were telling me this, I looked down and saw my hand wrapped around my necklace, hoping that this change was not going to happen. I struggled daily to prepare for possibly losing my Mimi and I did not get enough time with her. I remember the day she passed: May 20, 2022. I was devastated and overwhelmed with sadness, but then I remembered my necklace. This was the exact reason she wanted me to have it; she wanted me to know that our love would live forever. She wanted me to remember that when things changed and she passed away, the necklace would always keep her with me. My sisters understood the necklace’s meaning in the same way that I did.

I don’t think we Americans each handle change in the same way, and that is okay. Change can be a blessing, change can be a curse, and change can be heartbreaking or amusing. One thing I have learned is that having a treasured gift from someone you love can help you to process any change. I miss my Mimi every day, but I will always have my necklace to help me with this change.

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