Pre-K through 7th grade, I was a very quiet and introverted person. I was the type of girl in class that wouldn’t talk to that many people and would sit with only a few people during lunch. I used to be in the class where all the spanish-speaking students would be since I spoke Spanish, but I actually understood English too. Many people would make fun of our class since we spoke Spanish. Since I was scared of what people thought of me, I tried to not talk as much.
Everything was the same up until 5th grade. I ended up being separated from the class I was always with and the people I would always hangout with. I still had friends in that class, but I was not as close with them as I was with my old friends. I only saw my old friends during gym, lunch, and recess. Since I was separated from them and was put into a different class, I realized that I ended up being even more quiet than I already was. I found myself being scared of what people would think of me and all I wanted was to be back in my old class. Throughout my 5th grade year, I realized that I had made so many new friends and I felt so happy. Although I made new friends, some of them were very controlling. I found myself doing things I disliked to make others happy. I felt like I would get made fun of or bullied if I showed my true self and what I genuinely liked. Throughout my 5th-7th grade years, I kept being controlled by a group of friends. They had a bad influence on me, and I would do things I would have never done now. At that time, all I wanted was to have friends, and I didn’t even care if they were mean, controlling, rude, or manipulators because I just wanted to be liked by everyone in my grade. In 7th grade, I started realizing that the “friends” I had were definitely not my friends since they wanted me to do things I didn’t like. When I realized that they were having a bad influence on me, I started trying to separate myself from them. I used to cry a lot at night wishing that I was never friends with them because I thought I would be stuck with them as my friends forever.
One day, I ended up telling my mom about the people I was friends with and what they were saying about me and had me doing. She told me that if they were really my friends, I would not feel this way about myself and about other things. I ended up feeling very happy that I told my mom. After I talked to my mom about it, I ended up trying to distance myself from those people. When the summer after 7th grade came, I cut off all contact with them. I did not see them or hangout with them all summer. As a result, I felt much happier and made so many new friends. Now in my 8th grade year, I am surrounded by people who truly care about me and like me just for being myself. My true friends are the people that make me happy and I never have to worry about being “annoying” around them because I know they genuinely care about me and like me. I am still friends with the people who had a bad influence on me, but this time I stand up for myself and not let them control me and my thoughts.