As a young child, I was a crybaby and quite shy; I never wanted to leave my family’s side and was scared whenever they weren’t nearby. I remember I would plead with the school teacher for her to dial my mother’s phone; I was just that clingy.

Things changed, however, in October 2009, when I was five years old. A few years earlier, my father had immigrated to the United States. He found work, got settled in a house, and bought a car. It was then that my mother and I moved to America.

Obviously, I didn’t change right away; I was still crying all the time, and clinging to my family. Perhaps, even more at that time, as this was a completely new environment for me. However, in comparison to China, the United States is more focused on individual development first, rather than family or peer development. From this, I eventually learned independence.

That is not to say that I completely grew apart from my family; I was still quite family-oriented. Up until fourth grade, I still had that crybaby, clingy personality attached to me. However, in the fourth grade, I reluctantly agreed to have my parents sign me up for Taekwondo classes. I hesitated and even rejected that idea once before because I didn’t like the idea of sparring and other activities involved with the sport.

With my enrollment in Taekwondo, I began to change. In addition to the friends I made in an after school program, I started to meet many more people and create many more friendships. The teachers at the school were also fantastic people and encouraged me in the sport, teaching and refining my skills. Through Taekwondo, I became fitter and less chubby. Not only did I improve physically, but I also improved mentally. All of the drilling in, pushing through and breaking my limits taught me to be confident, patient, and strong-willed. I continued my journey in Taekwondo until I was a black belt first degree, participating in local tournaments and demonstrations.

At the same time, I started spending less time at home; I was at school during the day, followed by an after school program, and then Taekwondo classes in the afternoon. In fact, my Taekwondo passions drove my classes into the weekends. I would be dropped off at home by an after school program teacher at night, have dinner, and have some time to practice the piano and play video games before going to bed. My father worked night shifts, so he would always be gone off to work before I even returned home. As a result, I didn’t see my father often, even though we lived in the same household. As time went on, I became accustomed to being independent; I didn’t spend much time with family, as they worked five or six days a week to support me and my brother. Further, my ambitions in Taekwondo stemmed from my own desire of improving. I had changed greatly from the pre-immigration me to me now.

Today, I am even more independent than my eighth-grade self, when I had stopped taking Taekwondo lessons. Bombarded with schoolwork, extracurricular activities, and community service projects, I still spend the majority of my time outside of the house. I see my mother once in the morning when she drives me to school, and once more when I have dinner at the end of the day. My father, as the breadwinner of the family, is constantly working, and I still barely see him at home. Compared to the clingy, crybaby me years ago, I have completely changed into a confident, independent person. My personal story shows just how important and impacting one’s surrounding environment when growing up is for people that have an immigration background like me, it can be revolutionary.

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